Exalt him: A Mind Behind Maggot Brain

According to Wiki, Lucius “Tawl” Ross (b. 1948) was a rhythm guitarist for Funkadelic in its formative years of 1968 to 1971, culminating with the release of the band’s early magnum opus and legendary guitar flex, Maggot Brain. Most of my rock geek brethren agrees that peak Funkadelic lived in the albums behind the distinctive Pedro Bell covers. While critics tend to worship the (pre-Pedro Bell), Maggot Brain, to me it represents a band still in its infancy – it’d take until 1973 when the diaper came off with Cosmic Slop. The pinnacle of their coming-of-age would come with 1976’s Tales of Kidd Funkadelic.

(Listen here and tell me Lenny Kravitz didn’t completely imprint on this sound.)

I’m not sure what Tawl Ross’s significance to the band’s early formative sound was, much of the glory went to lead player Eddie Hazel, but Ross was at least in the room. If his solo record from 1995 – a.k.a. detrimental vasoline—Giant Shirley – was any indication, he may’ve been one of the sound’s oracles. (Compare to Eddie Hazel’s solo outing: Tawl wins by a mile.)

Whether Ross was in Funkadelic or not it was clearly in him on this notable record. Check it:





Here’s what peak Funkadelic (post-Tawl Ross) could do:

Ludwig Gone Odd

If you’d ever done time in the piano lesson torture chamber, you’ve experienced Für Elise. It’s safe to say that it’s one of humankind’s greatest melodies and precisely because of its simplicity and compactness – no fat, all taut muscle. It’s also contains volumes of the dynamic and dramatic and, according to this rendition, it’s rich ground for diddling whimsy.

Composed 210 years ago, when the master was 40 and still had a few years left of hearing. This melody will live on as long as civilization does.




A little something about 7/8 time: Also called septuple time – it’s an odd meter – it was a rhythm better known in Asia and the Middle East. Westerners may know it from Rush’s Tom Sawyer and Led Zeppelin’s The Ocean.

This guy offers up a simple explanation and good description of what it sounds like. (You can skip the proggy guitar lesson that follows.)

Pedo-defiler Drops Out: Comes Back Harder than Viagra

Her currency is the subtlety- and entendre-free graphic lyric. She’s got no time for euphemism and she spells it out in graffiti-sized fonts. She treats sex like Christian rock treats Jesus. She’s a 12-year-old boy who wants to impress the big kids with his savvy of porn details. Except unlike the delinquent boy, she adds a queer-friendliness. You want perspective? Go elsewhere.

Her backseat and public toilet-stall anthems include Deepthroat, Juicy Coochie, Cumshot, and Best Dick Sucker (it’s her, BTW). “Now you wanna act like you starstruck/Pussy woke you up like some Starbucks.”

She is CupcakKe and she’s by no means the first to go so basic blue in her lyrics but she may be the first to regret it.

When the erstwhile 22-year-old Elizabeth Eden Harris heard 10- and 11-year-olds rapping along with Best Dick Sucker, well, she’d some feels of remorse. In September 2019 made an “emotional” post to Instagram:

“When I made those songs I was 16, 17 and I couldn’t really give two shits, you know? But I saw a video and it was of a 13-year-old dancing to the music and I just decided that that’s it. I don’t wanna do music no more...I have people of all ages — 10, 11 years old — coming to my shows and I feel as though I’m corrupting them with my songs. And I don’t wanna do it no more so the tour is off… All of my music will be coming off every platform...I am just done, I want to go to heaven after this. I don’t want to go to hell.”

Ah well, that was so four months ago. Even as she made the announcement she still had tour dates to fulfill. Be that as it may, she’s back. Read her Twitter feed and she offers clues: She’s a weakness for tall stacks.

Well, that closet wasn’t going to fill itself.

And her beats are undeniable.